Who is involved?
SCENARIO: A student comes to tell you that a fight broke out last week after school. He seems upset and afraid, but also proud that he found the courage to tell you.
Your initial response recognizes the student’s action as positive and will likely encourage him to make the same choice in the future, and to come talk to you about all kinds of situations.
The decision to go immediately to the principal’s office may result in a missed opportunity to reinforce the student’s ability to be an ally. Building the capacities of students who are witnesses is one of the key ingredients leading to positive change in school culture.
The student’s safety has not been taken into account, putting him at risk of being “punished” by his peers. That may discourage him (as well as other students who may have wanted to take the same action) from speaking with you in the future.
2You ask the student why he waited so long to tell you, given the serious nature of the situation. You ask him for the name of the student who was targeted, and of the student who started the fight. Then you go straight to the principal’s office to give her their names.
Your reaction is natural: we may often feel disappointed – or even angry - when we encounter others’ inaction or lack of courage in the face of injustice. However, it is important to remember that for young people, as for adults, it can be very difficult to stand up against a bullying situation, which always requires a great deal of courage. The role of adults with students who are witnesses is mainly to keep the lines of communication open, to help build their skills and to support and encourage them to become allies.
The student may feel judged and worry about the consequences because he waited too long to report the problem. This may discourage him from sharing any other information about this situation – or any other situation.
This option may result in a missed opportunity to foster the development of skills that might increase the motivation and the ability of the student to act as an ally in the future.
Other students may observe your response and feel less inclined to speak out, thus reinforcing the code of silence that perpetuates the cycle of bullying and assault.
You’ve followed the school’s protocol in part, by gathering information and reporting it to the school administrators.
The student’s safety has not been taken into account, putting him at risk of being “punished” by his peers. That may discourage him (as well as other students who may have wanted to take the same action) from speaking with you in the future.
3You thank the student for having found the courage to tell you about the situation. You encourage him to give you more information about the situation (see Module 7 for more details about helpful strategies). You ask the student what he may need in terms of support and to ensure his safety. As specified in the school’s protocol, you let him know that you will need to tell the principal, and that if the student agrees, it will be important for you to meet with him again in order to follow up on the situation.
This option will allow you to foster the development of a safe school environment, breaking the code of silence that feeds bullying. This student (and many others) will be more likely to perceive you – and adults in general – as an important source of support and as someone who listens and who can be relied upon in a time of need.
This option reinforces the courageous act of this student, making him a model for other students who may then decide to speak openly about other situations. By prioritizing his safety, other students learn that they can take the same kind of initiative without fear. You have thereby reinforced the student’s – and other students’ – inherent motivation to become allies.
The student has the opportunity to develop important skills. In time, as he continues to build such skills, he will be increasingly motivated to be an ally when faced with future incidents of bullying.
You’ve taken the appropriate steps to deal with the situation and you’ve followed the school’s protocol.
✓Explanation of the recommended response.
Recommended response and explanation: The third answer is the recommended response. While all three responses recognize the importance of students acting as allies, only the third answers includes measures to: recognize the student’s courage; offer him support and facilitate his skill development; offer him choices; consider and prioritize his safety.
Note:For more helpful information about ways of encouraging and supporting students who act or who wish to act as allies (for example: effective protocols, procedures, and strategies for intervention and prevention), see Step 2 of this module, as well as Modules 6, 7, 8 and 9.